Getting In Touch with One's Self

Let me just start out by saying that this is NOT what all of you are thinking by the title. You see... as many of you know I have been trying since May to gain full custody of my princes from their loser 'father' (and I use that term loosely). It's been one hoop after another trying to get the papers filed, get a mediation date and a court date. I'm still waiting on the latter.



Before a court date can be filed, I must endure mediation which I did back in June which was a total waste of time! EH argued over who was going to pay what percentage of the mediator and the parenting coordinator that his side has requested. We NEVER discussed any of the issues that brought us to that point.



In the meantime, things have gotten worse since school has started. The boys are failing numerous assignments when they are with him, they are having numerous late assignments, he has flown off the handle at the oldest prince, grabbed a hold of him leaving swelling & bruising along with scaring the daylights out of the middle prince to the point where these two are scared to go. He refuses to discuss ANYTHING with me without his attorney present. He's slammed my car door into me and thrown a water bottle at me in his frustration after I told him that he could not open my truck door while I'm sitting in the truck. (This came after 2 aggressive emails from him.)



Fast forward to last week when I met with the parenting coordinator (PC). Her role from my understanding is to give me suggestions of how to better communicate with the ex in hopes of the problems going away. Well, after a 4.5 hour meeting, I walked out of there with the understanding that I need to find myself and get in touch with my inner voice. I was told to learn to heart-center and bring my 4 personalities to the center or my core. She told me to explore my Native American side and gave me a book on animal spirits. I kid you not! She also gave me a book on the 4 personalities - warrior, martyr, wanderer & orphan. Okay, what the fuck??? I went to get suggestions of how to communicate with an idiot so I don't lose my freakin' mind and I come out with books on animal spirits and told to find my animal totem and this will explain a lot!?! I left with papers to notify the ex about appointments for the princes and told to mail them certified if money was no object. WTF!!!

So, I'm off to read about animal spirits and find out what my flippin' dreams of snakes has to do with all the shit going on with my ex. lol

Just call me Pocahontas.